Pen-Pal-Guide - Writing to Immigrants in Detention

Sep 16, 2026

Pen-Pal-Guide provides guidance for writing letters to men and women held in immigration detention centers. It explains the emotional impact of detention, highlighting loneliness, uncertainty, and barriers to communication. It frames pen-pal letters as human connection that honors dignity and offers support. The guide outlines expectations for writers, including avoiding legal advice, keeping commitments, being mindful of power differences, maintaining tact, and respecting strict anti-proselytizing and inclusivity principles.

LanguageEnglish

CategoryLetters

FormatPDF

Pages6

Reading Time2 min

AccessFree to download

Writing to Immigrants in Detention

Purpose and value of letters

Key guidelines before committing

WHAT TO WRITE

Introductory and message ideas

First Friends of New Jersey & New York 53 S. Hackensack Ave Kearny, NJ 7032 Tel: 908.965.0455 E-mail: [info@firstfriendsnjny.org](info@firstfriendsnjny.org) Writing to Immigrants in Detention Living inside of an immigration detention center isn’t easy. Some people have said they feel lonely, confused, bored, and afraid. Being separated from family, friends, and all that is familiar is stressful. Being treated like a prisoner, while awaiting an unknown outcome, can take a tremendous psychological toll. Some—like the men being held in these facilities—do not even have a chance go outside. Often the food is unfamiliar, bland, and limited. Phone calls cost several dollars a minute, and therefore, are out of reach financially for many. Your letter can be solace, encouragement, and a very real connection to the outside world in the midst of this difficult time in someone’s life. When we write to men and women being detained, we are making a human connection across the walls and barbed wire. We are honoring the dignity of every human being—something not always done inside the centers. Your letter also sends a message to the person receiving it and the others around him or her that someone knows they are there. They are not alone. They have support. Some people have said that guards treat them better when they receive letters and visitors. As your letter will mean so much to many of the people to whom you write, here are a few things to understand before you make a commitment to write to those being detained: • We write as friends. We are not writing as lawyers, doctors, or social workers. We are one human connecting with another human being in solidarity as we seek to honor the dignity of all. Do not attempt to give legal advice. • Keep your promises. Don’t make commitments you can’t keep. If you say you will write to someone, you must. Your letter means so much more than most of us can possibly imagine. You may not be able or willing todo what someone asks of you—call family, send money, etc. That is okay. Know your own boundaries. And talk with a facilitator of the writing project when questions arise. • Do not take away someone’s power. While they may be in a temporarily vulnerable position, many immigrant men and women in detention centers are some of the most courageous, intelligent, gifted, resourceful people you may have the privilege of meeting. Do not romanticize them as the “detainee” or victimize them to the point of taking power away from them. Many have been successful business people, survived horrendous situations due to their own resourcefulness, traveled the world to arrive here, learned to speak several languages, attended university, and been leaders in their families, towns and schools. • Be aware of your own power. You have more “power” than detained immigrants due to your freedom and status in this country. Be careful to not abuse the power difference. And never do for someone what he or she can do for themselves. • Keep in mind your letters may be read by a guard. Be tactful and conscious. For example, if you talk about immigration or the detention system with anger or disgust, it may be the detainee that will be the one who will suffer from your words, not you. We are here to be compassionate friends and to love everyone. • Be sensitive to the fact that the person reading your letter may be inferring messages differently than you imply due to their current circumstances. Loneliness, power differences, and language differences could play into the person being detained misunderstanding you or feeling more intimately connected to you than you intend. • We have a strict no-proselytizing policy. It is not appropriate to try to convert anyone to your religion. It is important to give the detained immigrant the power to guide the conversation. If they bring up religion, then you may discuss the topic on their terms. Be careful to never make it seem like participating in a certain religion is

FAQs

Why are letters from pen pals important for people in immigration detention?

Letters provide solace, encouragement, and a real connection to the outside world. They affirm that the person is known, supported, and not alone.

What should pen pals avoid when writing to detained immigrants?

Pen pals should not provide legal advice and should be mindful not to abuse power differences. They also must follow a strict no-proselytizing policy and avoid making it seem that religion is required to receive letters.

How can pen pals keep their letters respectful if guards may read them?

Writers should be tactful and conscious in what they share. Anger or disgust about immigration or the detention system may cause the detainee to suffer from the words.

Sep 16, 2026

Upload by Taylor Morgan