The Sacred Search - What if It's Not about Who You Marry, but Why?

Oct 17, 2026

A devotional and reflective Christian book exploring why marriage choices matter more than superficial attraction or just “who you marry.” Through contrasting real-life scenarios and a structured progression of chapters, the text examines expectations, compatibility, intimacy, character challenges, and intentional dating. It emphasizes spiritual perspective and inner transformation, using scriptural quotations from multiple Bible translations to frame practical, faith-based guidance for building and sustaining marriage relationships.

LanguageEnglish

CategoryReligion & Spirituality

FormatPDF

Pages32

Reading Time1 h 21 min

AccessFree to download

Contents

A Tale of Two Tears

The Great Exception

Infatuated with Infatuation

You May Not Want What You Think You Want

Soul Mate or Sole Mate?

A Match Made in Heaven?

Walk toward the Music

Better to Marry Than Burn

What's Your Style?

Can You Climb a Mountain Together?

Making a Marriage

Is Anybody in Charge?

You’re Looking for a Complement, Not a Clone

Dating with Intention

Your Brain on Sex

Problem People

How Would Jesus Date?

Knowing When It’s No

Epilogue: A New Vision

Notes

Author Information

U PDATED & R EVISED BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF SACRED MARRIAGE GARY THOMAS THE SACRED SEARCH What if It ’s Not about Who You Marry, but Why? THE SACRED SEARCH Published by David C Cook 4050 Lee Vance Drive Colorado Springs, CO 80918 U.S.A. Integrity Music Limited, a Division of David C Cook Brighton, East Sussex BN1 2RE, England The graphic circle C logo is a registered trademark of David C Cook. All rights reserved. Except for brief excerpts for review purposes, no part of this book may be reproduced or used in any form without written permission from the publisher. The website addresses recommended throughout this book are offered as aresource to you. These websites are not intended in any way to be or imply an endorsement on the part of David C Cook, nor do we vouch for their content. Some names have been changed to protect privacy. Permission has been obtained for use of all other personal accounts. Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture quotations are taken from THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide. Scripture quotations marked ESV are taken from the ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved; NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible®, copyright © 1960, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. (www. [Lockman.org](Lockman.org)); NKJV are taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved. The author has added italics to Scripture quotations for emphasis. Library of Congress Control Number 2012951904 ISBN 978-1-8307-4-8191-1 eISBN 978-1-8307-8192-8 © 2013, 2021 Gary Thomas Published in association with Yates & Yates, [www.yates2.com](www.yates2.com). First edition published in 2013 © Gary Thomas, ISBN 978-1-4347-0489-4 The Team: Michael Covington, Stephanie Bennett, Judy Gillispie, James Hershberger, Susan Murdock Cover Design: James Hershberger Printed in the United States of America Second Edition 2021 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 011421 This book is dedicated in celebration of my son Graham’s marriage to Molly on July 12, 2014. May you both grow in grace and love for eachother as you enjoy the blessing of a lifelong love. Contents Acknowledgments 13 1. A Tale of Two Tears 15 2. The Great Exception 23 3. Infatuated with Infatuation 30 4. You May Not Want What You Think You Want 43 5. Soul Mate or Sole Mate? 53 6. A Match Made in Heaven? 67 7. Walk toward the Music 73 8. Better to Marry Than Burn 81 9. What’s Your Style? 88 10. Can You Climb a Mountain Together? 107 11. Making a Marriage 121 12. Is Anybody in Charge? 134 13. You’re Looking for a Complement, Not a Clone 142 14. Dating with Intention 155 15. Your Brain on Sex 163 16. Problem People 184 17. How Would Jesus Date? 194 18. Knowing When It’s No 202 Epilogue: A New Vision 217 Notes 221 Author Information 224 Acknowledgments I’d like to thank those who read previous versions of this book and offered many helpful comments: Lisa Thomas, Steve and Rebecca Wilke, Mary Kay Smith, John Card, Steve and Candice Watters, Lindsey Thomas, and Jay Fields. A special thanks is also due to Dr. Ed Young and our home church, Second Baptist in Houston, Texas, for the support base they provide. I am also very grateful tomy agents, Curtis Yates and Mike Salisbury of Yates and Yates, for their friendship and partnership for so many years; and to the David C Cook team: Stephanie Bennett and Michael Covington. It’s an honor to be part of your team. For this second edition, I’m grateful to Andi Perkins and Matt Clark for making further suggestions on the update. 13 A Tale of Two Tears I’d like to share two true scenarios with you. Together they reveal how crucial it is to

FAQs

What is the core question behind The Sacred Search?

The book asks whether marriage is primarily about who you marry, or more deeply about why you make that choice and what it produces in your life.

How do the opening scenarios frame the book’s message?

It contrasts tears of pain from a marriage that feels like a burden with tears of joy from a spouse who provides encouragement through hardship.

What themes does the book’s chapter outline suggest?

The contents indicate coverage of marriage expectations, intentional dating, personal character and challenges, sexual and relational perspectives, and guidance for building a shared life together.

Oct 17, 2026

Uploaded by WPS_1790064749