[{"data":1,"prerenderedAt":-1},["ShallowReactive",2],{"detail-sidebar-cat-1-en-105":3,"doc-seo-281151-105":53,"doc-detail-281151-en":126},{"code":4,"msg":5,"data":6},0,"success",[7,14,19,24,29,34,39,44,49],{"id":8,"doc_module":9,"doc_module_name":10,"category_name":11,"show_sort_weight":12,"slug":13},11,1,"Template","Presentations",90,"presentations",{"id":15,"doc_module":9,"doc_module_name":10,"category_name":16,"show_sort_weight":17,"slug":18},12,"Resumes",80,"resumes",{"id":20,"doc_module":9,"doc_module_name":10,"category_name":21,"show_sort_weight":22,"slug":23},14,"Invoices",70,"invoices",{"id":25,"doc_module":9,"doc_module_name":10,"category_name":26,"show_sort_weight":27,"slug":28},15,"Posters",60,"posters",{"id":30,"doc_module":9,"doc_module_name":10,"category_name":31,"show_sort_weight":32,"slug":33},16,"Social Media",50,"social-media",{"id":35,"doc_module":9,"doc_module_name":10,"category_name":36,"show_sort_weight":37,"slug":38},17,"Forms",40,"forms",{"id":40,"doc_module":9,"doc_module_name":10,"category_name":41,"show_sort_weight":42,"slug":43},18,"Letters",30,"letters",{"id":45,"doc_module":9,"doc_module_name":10,"category_name":46,"show_sort_weight":47,"slug":48},21,"Paper Templates",5,"papers-templates",{"id":50,"doc_module":9,"doc_module_name":10,"category_name":51,"show_sort_weight":4,"slug":52},158,"General","general-158",{"code":4,"msg":54,"data":55},"ok",{"site_id":56,"language":57,"slug":58,"title":59,"keywords":60,"description":61,"schema_data":62,"social_meta":119,"head_meta":121,"extra_data":123,"updated_unix":125},105,"en","amends-letter-directions","Amends Letter - Directions","","Amends letter directions explain the purpose and structure of the final disclosure step, emphasizing repairing harm by bringing together understanding, apology, and future prevention. The guidance frames amends as an “a-mends” process that replaces hiding with accountability. It outlines three stages—accountability, empathy, and compassion—then provides prompts to review prior What & How and Why letters and the partner’s Impact letter. Exercises support honest reflection through bullet points, not polished prose, and encourage vulnerability while connecting actions to the partner’s pain.",{"@graph":63,"@context":118},[64,80,101],{"@type":65,"itemListElement":66},"BreadcrumbList",[67,71,74,77],{"item":68,"name":69,"@type":70,"position":9},"https://docshare.wps.com","Home","ListItem",{"item":72,"name":10,"@type":70,"position":73},"https://docshare.wps.com/template/",2,{"item":75,"name":41,"@type":70,"position":76},"https://docshare.wps.com/template/letters/",3,{"item":78,"name":59,"@type":70,"position":79},"https://docshare.wps.com/template/amends-letter-directions/281151/",4,{"url":78,"name":59,"@type":81,"image":82,"author":87,"headline":59,"publisher":90,"fileFormat":93,"inLanguage":57,"description":61,"dateModified":94,"datePublished":95,"encodingFormat":93,"isAccessibleForFree":96,"interactionStatistic":97},"DigitalDocument",{"url":83,"@type":84,"width":85,"height":86},"https://docshare.wps.com/thumbnails/amends-letter-directions/281151.png","ImageObject",442,249,{"name":88,"@type":89},"Franzy","Person",{"url":68,"name":91,"@type":92},"DocShare","Organization","application/pdf","2026-10-28","2026-09-16",true,{"@type":98,"interactionType":99,"userInteractionCount":25},"InteractionCounter",{"@type":100},"ViewAction",{"@type":102,"mainEntity":103},"FAQPage",[104,110,114],{"name":105,"@type":106,"acceptedAnswer":107},"What is the purpose of the Amends letter in the disclosure process?","Question",{"text":108,"@type":109},"The Amends letter puts together understanding of what happened, how it happened, and its impact, then shares what was done and plans to prevent it in the future. It focuses on deeper comprehension rather than repeating patterns of hiding or deception.","Answer",{"name":111,"@type":106,"acceptedAnswer":112},"What are the three steps outlined for writing the Amends letter?",{"text":113,"@type":109},"The directions divide the process into accountability, empathy, and compassion. Each step adds a different dimension: honesty about actions, connection to the partner’s emotions, and a repair-oriented attitude.",{"name":115,"@type":106,"acceptedAnswer":116},"What prompts are used during the accountability step?",{"text":117,"@type":109},"Accountability asks where the writer went wrong, which promises were broken, and how harm was done to the partner, others, relationships, and the self. The answers can be drawn from the What & How and Why letters and the partner’s Impact letter.","https://schema.org",{"og:url":78,"og:type":120,"og:title":59,"og:site_name":91,"og:description":61},"article",{"robots":122,"canonical":78},"index,follow",{"doc_id":124,"site_id":56},281151,1790288176,{"code":4,"msg":5,"data":127},{"doc_id":124,"user_id":128,"nickname":88,"user_avatar":129,"doc_module":9,"category_id":40,"category_name":41,"doc_title":59,"doc_description":61,"doc_content":130,"file_id":131,"file_url":132,"file_type":133,"file_size":134,"view_count":25,"is_deleted":4,"is_public":9,"is_downloadable":9,"audit_status":9,"page_count":135,"language":136,"language_code":57,"site_id":56,"html_lang":57,"table_of_contents":137,"faqs":138,"seo_title":139,"seo_description":61,"update_tm":140,"read_time":76},2336478945519,"https://ap-avatar.wpscdn.com/davatar_085a072bc5b1113ac321206ff7593b45","Amends Letter  \nThe last letter in the disclosure process is the Amends letter. By the time you reach this part of the process, you likely have a much better understanding of yourself, your story, your patterns, and how both you and your partner were affected by each of those pieces of the puzzle. You are no longer hiding. You no longer carry the weight and shame of the secrets you held for so long.  \nMending something is to make it whole again, to repair it. The whole disclosure process is an “a-mends” process (as in you’re mending your relationship and the pain you’ve caused), and the Amends letter puts all those pieces together. To fully apologize for something we did that hurt someone else, we need to see what we did, understand how we got to a place that those things happened, see how it affected them, do the work so we won’t do it again, and do what we can to repair it.  \nThe first letter helped you to see what you did and share that information with your partner, changing your previous pattern of hiding and deceiving. The second letter helped you see how you got to where you got to and therefore what you can do to change those patterns in the future. The Impact letter helped you understand how your betrayal affected your partner. This last letter helps you show that you have a deeper understanding of what happened, how it happened, how it affected your partner, and helps you share what you have done and plan to continue to do to prevent it happening in the future to change those patterns.  \nThe directions for the Amends letter are adapted with permission from Amends asthe Key to Rebuilding Trust, a presentation by Dina Hijazi and Daniel Gowan. They divide the amends process into three steps: accountability, empathy, and compassion.  \nAccountability requires honesty, self-reflection, and courage. It asks the question“Where did I go wrong?” In other words, what did you do that was incongruent with who you are and want to be? What promises (spoken or unspoken) did you break? How did you hurt your partner, others in your life, your relationships, and yourself? Many of the answers to the questions I just listed are in the other two letters you wrote and the Impact letter your partner wrote.  \nReview your What & How and Why letters, and your partner’s Impact letter if you have a copy of it (if your therapist has a copy, you can review it in their office instead) and consider the above questions. It takes honesty, self-reflection, and courage to take this step. Honesty because you have to lean into looking at what  \n©2022 Laney Knowlton. All Rights Reserved.  \nyou’ve done without excusing it, justifying it, or minimizing it or the effect it had on others. Self-reflection because you need to be willing to look at yourself, what you’ve done, and how you got there. Courage because it is often painful and scary to look at the things we’ve done related to the betrayals, which are often the things we are most ashamed of.  \nExercise 39 –  \nReview your What & How and Why letters. Review your partner’s Impact letter if you have a copy of it. If not, think back on the presentation of the Impact letter. Be fully honest with yourself. What did you do to your partner, others in your life, your relationships, and yourself? At this point, you’re just writing down stream of consciousness or bullet points; you’re not trying to write fully formed sentences or paragraphs (unless you process better that way).  \nThe second step in writing the Amends letter is adding empathy. Empathy is understanding someone else’s pain by connecting it to emotions you’ve experienced that are similar or give context to what the other person might be feeling. For example, if someone’s pet dies, you might have empathy for them if you’ve had a pet you really cared about, even if your pet is still alive. You could consider how much you love your pet and how painful it might be to lose them.  \nThe question Dina and Daniel focus on for this step is “How did I bring harm ","cbCaitaFyulD9z1m","https://ap.wps.com/l/cbCaitaFyulD9z1m","pdf",116527,7,"English","# Amends Letter - Directions\n## Purpose of the Amends Letter\n## Three Steps: Accountability, Empathy, Compassion\n## Exercise 39: Review Letters and Write Notes","[{\"question\":\"What is the purpose of the Amends letter in the disclosure process?\",\"answer\":\"The Amends letter puts together understanding of what happened, how it happened, and its impact, then shares what was done and plans to prevent it in the future. It focuses on deeper comprehension rather than repeating patterns of hiding or deception.\"},{\"question\":\"What are the three steps outlined for writing the Amends letter?\",\"answer\":\"The directions divide the process into accountability, empathy, and compassion. Each step adds a different dimension: honesty about actions, connection to the partner’s emotions, and a repair-oriented attitude.\"},{\"question\":\"What prompts are used during the accountability step?\",\"answer\":\"Accountability asks where the writer went wrong, which promises were broken, and how harm was done to the partner, others, relationships, and the self. The answers can be drawn from the What \\u0026 How and Why letters and the partner’s Impact letter.\"}]","Amends Letter - Directions | PDF",1789564541]