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smell.","https://schema.org",{"og:url":83,"og:type":124,"og:title":65,"og:site_name":95,"og:description":67},"article",{"robots":126,"canonical":83},"index,follow",{"doc_id":128,"site_id":62},569816,1792484414,{"code":4,"msg":5,"data":131},{"doc_id":128,"user_id":132,"nickname":92,"user_avatar":133,"doc_module":4,"category_id":8,"category_name":10,"doc_title":65,"doc_description":67,"doc_content":134,"file_id":135,"file_url":136,"file_type":137,"file_size":138,"view_count":14,"is_deleted":4,"is_public":8,"is_downloadable":8,"audit_status":8,"page_count":139,"language":140,"language_code":63,"site_id":62,"html_lang":63,"table_of_contents":141,"faqs":142,"seo_title":143,"seo_description":67,"update_tm":144,"read_time":145},3985747859343,"https://ap-avatar.wpscdn.com/davatar_276721f389ce27ea32af1340a28f341c","# A Shallow Girl'sGuide to ReheatingLeftovers\n\nAnne Egeland  \nThis book is dedicated to:  \nPeterPaulLoganKiraChristianCatieBillyRiley  \n&the ones who haven't quite gotten here yet  \nw22,laeten的增的0.作nmegearke  \n# Prologue\n\n\"I think I did pretty well,considering I started outwith nothing but a bunch of blank paper.\"-SteveMartin  \nThis book is a compilation of diary entries,blogposts,emails,and stories of my clumsy,idioticadventures that I would tell to my friends when lhad too much to drink and felt a little too honest.  \nMake no mistake:mid-2008 to mid-2009 was theworst year of my life.I have decided to makesomething good come out of that year.I lookedfor the funny in every situation,and I tended tofall ass-first into weird situations that would makeeveryone around me laugh.Those are the  \nstories I compiled here for you to read.Becausehonestly,in that year,these humorous situations  \nwere the only thing that kept me going as lwaded through the hell that was my life at thattime.  \nSincerely,  \nAnne Egeland  \nAka Enna Stein of KosherPorkchops.com  \n# Making A Good Impression\n\nI try,against all odds,to be ladylike at work.It'san uphill battle.I am not ladylike at all.I don'twear high heels,because I know that I look like arhino trying to delicately tiptoe through the marshwhen I wear them.I bite my nails.I rarely do myhair.I abstain from all forms of lipstick since italways ends up on my teeth.My nylons,when Iwear them,frequently get runs and tears in them.I have been waiting since the age of four to  \nfinally grow some facial hair so I can just becomea man already.I am a hot mess in a girl's body.  \nI made popcorn at work one day.Why?Noreason other than I was hungry and it was thehealthiest thing available in the vending  \nmachine.Every time I passed the vendingmachine my stomach would remind me thatthose five Twix bars are calling for me,yearningfor me to accept my fate and just become a fatgirl already.  \nBut I abstain from the Twix bars and pop myselfsome popcorn instead.I head back to my office,lean back in my chair and start to toss pieces upinto my mouth.I miss my mouth a lot.Then lsuddenly remember there's a meeting l amsupposed to be in.Pretending to care,I hustleto the meeting.  \nIn the middle of the meeting,I realize there isabout a handful of popcorn in my cleavage.So,when my boss decides it's time to take a breakfrom the meeting and everyone gets up to stretchand go check their email,I am left alone in the  \nroom.  \nYou know where this is going.  \nI reach down my shirt,grab a handful of popcorn,and start eating.What I failed to realize,  \nhowever,was that the guy who was late to themeeting came in through the backdoor of themeeting room-the door that was inconvenientlybehind me,and saw me take popcorn out of myboobs and eat it.  \nI look up at him,mouth fullof popcorn and say,”Ehhhy Pfofkern?”This was my way of saying,with my mouth full,\"Want any popcorn?\"I knowyou're thinking this sounds like I might be  \nvaguely hitting on him,but let me assure you lam not nearly attractive enough to pull that lineoff sexily.I really did not know what else to say.  \nThe guy laughs so hard he starts coughing andleaves back out the door.  \nThe rest of the meeting I had to deal with peopleasking,\"Does anyone smellpopcorn?\"The guywho caught me boob-snacking was trying hardnot to laugh,all while I try not to piss myself outof fear that he will tellon me and my secret boobstash.  \nAll in all,I have to say I think I am making a greatimpression at this new company.  \nSuperqirl Strikes Again  \nWe blew a tire recently.Considering the  \ngovernment has yet to identify me as a nationaltreasure and pay me handsomely for being such,l am still very much broke.  \nI took the car to a tire center right by our houseand asked if they had any used tires or howmuch it would cost to replace one tire.The guylooked at the tires on my car and told me he hasNO IDEA how the car is not sitting on four flatsinstead of one.For those of you wondering if theguy was ","cbCaiaYskNSciyni","https://ap.wps.com/l/cbCaiaYskNSciyni","pdf",4127815,184,"English","# Prologue\n# Making A Good Impression\n# Superqirl Strikes Again","[{\"question\":\"What kind of content does the book include?\",\"answer\":\"The book compiles diary entries, blog posts, emails, and stories based on the author’s clumsy, humorous adventures.\"},{\"question\":\"Why did the author decide to write from mid-2008 to mid-2009?\",\"answer\":\"Those months were described as the worst year of her life, and she chose to look for humor in every situation to keep going and turn it into stories.\"},{\"question\":\"What happens in the “Making A Good Impression” episode?\",\"answer\":\"The author eats popcorn during a meeting, but a late arrival sees her taking popcorn from her cleavage, leading to awkward laughter and follow-up questions about the popcorn smell.\"}]","A Shallow Girl's Guide to Reheating Leftovers | PDF",1791877692,283]